Most guys can’t even comprehend (and some might actually be frightened to learn) the lengths we go to in the name of beauty. Between the waxing, plucking, and bleaching, men will never have a full grasp on all the effort we put into trying to look good. Here are six facts we wish dudes appreciated more about the continuous upkeep involved in trying to put our best foot (and face) forward:
1. Eyelash Curlers Are Terrifying
But damn if they don’t make our eyes pop, so we keep on shoving them in our sockets, night after night, day after day. We’d like to see a guy operate one of those things without flinching.
2. Spray Tans Definitely Aren’t Like Being at the Beach
You’re standing in a small, dimly lit room, naked, freezing, and vulnerable, while a stranger blasts you with a potent-smelling, misty chemical. Then you can’t touch anything for 24 hours without staining it burnt orange. The little bit of color is universally flattering, but it certainly comes at a cost.
3. Taking Makeup off Is a Gigantic Pain in the Ass
Applying makeup can be kind of fun. But removing it is the biggest hassle of all time. All you want to do is collapse into the sheets the minute you get home, but instead, you have to pour oil onto a cotton ball and gently but firmly rub both your eyes, then vigorously scrub your face, all before slicking on a layer of burning alcohol-based toner, then a slather of moisturizer. Oh, and some eye cream. It’s either all that or raging acne and premature aging—take your pick.
4. Hair Removal Could Also Be a Viable Torture Technique
Ripping the hair from its root via hot wax is brutal no matter if it’s coming from between your legs or under your brows. Ready for your eyes to start shedding tears uncontrollably? Try threading. Want to simulate what it feels like to set your face on fire? Bleach your upper lip ‘stache. You get the idea. Can women being hairy just become a thing?
5. Manis and Pedis Are Time-Consuming and Expensive
Although somewhat of a luxury, regular nail upkeep is a damn full-time job. Yes, the results are pretty, but making the time for it (and forking over your credit card) every week or two isn’t without its stresses. #Firstworldproblems, indeed.
RELATED: 6 WAYS TO MAKE A MANI AND PEDI LAST LONGER
6. Facials Sometimes Have a Catastrophic Aftermath
Professional facials are not only pricey, but there’s also the chance that they’ll leave you shiny and red-faced for an undisclosed amount of time before they actually make your skin look better. You have to avoid public outings for as long as it takes. Yet, we continue to subject ourselves and our bank accounts to them, all in the hope of exuding that good ole’ youthful glow.
